My Girl

My baby returned home from church camp last week after being gone 4 days. It was her first time and we weren't sure how any moment of it would go. We weren't sure the emotions we would feel...she would feel. Would we pack all her things and add extra bottled water in every available pocket in her luggage in case there was some sort of chaotic water shortage? Would we arrive at the church to stow away her suitcase and help her get on the bus, only to violently break out of the crowd, snatch her up and declare she is only but an infant with gums, sharpei legs and is in no way capable of navigating this world without me along for the ride?

 Turns out...my girl is more than capable. My girl is growing up.

                           She blows me away.

We did let the bus pull away with our only and spent four days pacing the floor, existing in silence with no FROZEN songs or sounds coming from anywhere. We cooked food we liked and went to bed at 8:30pm. All the while, my baby's heart was being so solidly poured into by leaders of the church camp and leaders of our church. She came home and told of all the fun stuff...the swimming,  the zip line, the friends. She also held her new bible closely and read the verses highlighted by her leader that I know she'll always carry in her heart. She told about the amazing worship and how she's definitely ready to go back next year. I was still reeling from her bus exit. I never wanted to get to my child more. I promised I wouldn't cry but the tears came under my aviators. I let her out of our hug and she looked at me. She had something to tell me. Her voice sang while she told me she had be saved! She had asked Jesus into her heart.

My goodness. Praise Him!! All glory to our father in Heaven!!

Proud is not a word that measures up. My heart exploded. There just weren't words adequate for the moment.

What an incredible honor to have this beautiful girl that emerged 10 years ago from my unsure 19 year old womb, that I fed until her legs grew longer than mine are now, that will be entering the FIFTH grade, that wins my heart everyday with her strength and wit...run up to me and tell me she's chosen Jesus. Her decision to know and follow Jesus is the most important one of her life. It is the one decision that will take her EVERYWHERE.

She turns 10 years old this Sunday. A decade.
A decade of Christmases, birthdays, learning together, failing together.
A decade of ponytails, missing teeth and homework.
A decade of smiles, tears, knock knock jokes and more Barbies than I can ever count.


It all goes to quickly. It's easy. It's so hard. It's joyful. It's tiring. It's laid back. It's hard work.
Being Mama to my girl is hands down the best thing I will ever do. The most worthwhile and only second to being a Godly wife, one of the ways I feel the closest to God in my own life. I am only capable of love in the capacity of my "human suit". God IS LOVE. It is what He is. Sometimes I just soak that in. I know how much I love my daughter. My family. He loves me MORE. How?? It's incredible. It's wonderous. It's true.

Daily I am in awe of what is possible when God is the leader.

Psalm 54:4